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Games People Play - Updated Weekly

Games People Play - Updated Weekly

by Dogbert
Your weekly 1-stop for satire on roleplaying games, videogames, politics... or whatever geek stuf, really. Not for the easily offended. You have been warned.

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5 Days Ago

Games People Play - Updated Weekly

Your weekly 1-stop for satire on roleplaying games, videogames, politics... or whatever geek stuf, really. Not for the easily offended. You have been warned.

Feedback and comments at


Recent Comments

January 7th, 2018
...Where no Trek has gone before
So, not only a Trek movie by Tarantino, it's also going to be rated R.

I really was hoping it was a joke, I really hoped first thing in the new year would be Paramount debunking that rumor... but alas, they didn't.

What's next? HBO doing Star Wars?
January 4th, 2018
Last Week In The News
If you live in the US, you probably want to buy that book.

Granted, you need to look no further than twitter and tv to see 45's idiocy, but having the complete compilation handy is always a plus, and the fact that 45 wants that book to cease existing only adds to its value. "Cease and Desist" is the new "Stop the press!" (for those of you born after news papers, that used to mean "release this for yesterday").

Fun Fact: Buying all existing copies of an "uncomfortable truths" publication is Mexico's government's way to silence what few examples of good journalism we have.

@Afro goblin: Ikr? I mean, sure, in Japan it's old news. The internet picks the darndest things to elevate.
I'm amazed we've managed to glorify Poop of all things. Horrifies me when I see ads where children are holding up "poop emoji" toys......
December 4th, 2017
Season Greetings
I don't dare saying "Happy Holidays."

There are millions out there who are being miserable as I type this.

Still, try to make the best of the Holidays. Hug your loved ones.
DoubleThink R Us
After hearing that, seemingly, some deranged members of the alt-right are now adopting The Punisher as their new Pepe, that social media post I saw from a marvel writer a couple weeks ago suddenly made a lot more sense. While I can't find the aforementioned post, the poster complained about how they have been working for decades on stories centered on protagonists that fight oppression and discrimination only for people to go and root for the sentinels.

I can only imagine the colossal amount of mental gymnastics a wannabe-nazi must go through to watch Frank Castle smash the skulls of a white trash group and give them concrete shoes before they could kill a latino immigrant... and then think that, for some reason, Castle stands with his anti-values of hatred and pettiness.

In any case, the series has plenty of Marvel's vets as exec producers and the music is done by Tyler Bates. Watch it.
Round 5?
The fight for net neutrality is becoming like being a recovering alcoholic working at a winery. First you thought you only struggled with detox once and you were free... then you have to struggle again, and again, and then it's every day, and then it's EVERY. FREAKING. HOUR.

Also, like all other monsters from the current Cobra regime, now Pai resorts to victim rhetoric, and suddenly the villain is not him, but whistleblowers and protestors.

So, your yearly reminder: This December, Ajit Pai will try to kill net neutrality again. If you live in the U.S, contact your representatives, and give the FCC a piece of your mind.
May final doom be staved off one more year
Just that, no cheer.

It's just pathfinder 40k, but they made the mistake of making the universes the same because of Canonical fucking aliens in Pathfinder. That's where all the setting based errors come about.

Also even if they made a Pathfinder 2E and didn't include the faults you mention, then they'd just be bankrupting themselves because their fans who actually vocalize and don't get banned are fucking retards who care more about the effect on their bookshelves and physical collections than they do about the rules, and the rules they do care about is all about being endeared to "optimization" and pretending everything is perfect and if you disagree with them you can fuck off. After all that's Paizo's market, disgruntled whiners about 4e who just wanted more and more splat books instead of accepting an evolution from their Min/Max caster fagging.

Which makes you saying 3.X is the non-draconian side is fucking hilarious. As much bitching as you and other "personalities" makes about it, in practice of 5e it's more like if something isn't there at a minor inconvenience, then you ask the GM and 8/10 times they'll say "yeah sure" rather than having to beg and suck their dick for the GM to do anything in your favor, because most GMs understand it's not a competition between them and the players. But considering your comic is a strawman and you're a whining git who uses extremes, it makes me wonder if you have an actual group to run and discuss things with.
November 11th, 2017
Battle For Azeroth
So, the latest WoW expansion is already in Beta... and if Sylvanas is really in charge of the Horde now, then the sociopolitical commentary got definitely less than subtle.

Try it, just say it loudly, you'll put 2 and 2 together right away.

By the way, credit for this page goes to Nerf Now's Jo Pereira, who basically gave me the idea on a silver platter one week ago (and he's probably not likely to use it, since he's averse to unnecessary controversy in his webcomic).

Me-Too Material
If you ask me, there's little to no way you could do a Red Sonja in this day and age without reaching at least the critical mass of outrage for a month-long internet shitstorm where names would be thrown, NBC would demonize gamers yet again in attempt to remain relevant, and the geeks would remain polarized and divided to the benefit of those who profit from keeping the people divided.

...then again, that's the same I used to think about Wonder Woman, which turned out glorious against all expectations.

...not that I expect lightning to strike twice.

...Let Him See
While I can't say I feel one way or the other about Gigantic, it was sad to see the untimely demise of Torchlight's makers.

The ones who should be most worried, however, are Cryptic Studios... closing two studios and firing everyone on the same day sounds like some aggressive spring cleaning from PWE (yes, spring, all business decisions are made two business quarters in advance) and Cryptic shares the same profile as our two victims:

1) "Underperformer" (their games are niche products, mostly).

In Mexico, we have a saying: When you see your neighbour cutting his beard, start preparing to do the same. I just hope Valiance Online is released before the curtain comes down beacause, from where I see it, the writing is already on the wall.

Still alive!
Nothing to add.

October 18th, 2017
An Indecent Proposal?
THIS NOTE really should have been posted sooner, but the prior comics just couldn't be delayed.

Granted... there's already plenty of material to impeach 45 into oblivion, it has been there since the elections, yet nothing happens, so no amount of dirt mr. Flynt could bring would make any difference, sadly.

@Dogbert: Fair enough. I chose Lars because of the viking hat. Went kind of a Scandinavian way with it.
@Brian: His name for some reason turned out to be "Bill." I like Strawman for last name, though!
One of the main reasons I was eager to read Starfinder was because it's been about seven years since Pathfinder first came about, and I'm sure they're using SF to test ideas that may become Pathfinder's second edition.

Now, I can only hope I'm wrong, because it seems Jacobs & co. have been playing too much d&d 5E, and used its worst elements (namely, player disempowerment as main design objective). Not only that, the setting is blatantly incomplete: a future tie-in with your fantasy game, but absolutely NO HISTORY on how they got there? Seriously? The only explanation is that mr. Sutter didn't read Dragonstar and in his inability to reconcile elements, he just threw up his hands and decided not to do it.

Also, you can't make players totally dependant on equipment if you're going to have two different economy scales (equipment and starships) since all you need is hijack a ship, sell it, and the game breaks. The way to deal with this would have been trivializing equipment so only ship economy remains, make player characters less dependant on equipment, not more (remember that episode where Kirk and Spock were penny-pinching for Comm Badge parts? Yeah me neither).

Now, granted, not everything in Starfinder is flaming excrement: Salvaging Saga's a-la carte class feature is a genuinely good idea, and refurbishing 4E's Second Wind points into something actually serviceable is also a net gain. Alas, those two are the only good ideas, and clearly not enough to rescue this garbage fire of a game that treads on the sad brown line between too draconian for 3.X fans and not draconian enough for 5E fans (and thus, it will please neither demographic other than hard-core Paizo apologists).

Avoid this book like the plague, especially when Aethera does a light-years better job at bringing you Space Opera for Pathfinder.

Viking hat guy
Does the Viking hat guy have a name? I suggest Lars Strawman! :D
Chapter 2: #85
Comment title for those who checked like me, also I noticed you used the 4e DM Screen?

In one RPG like Mutant: Year Zero, each PC declares NPC's into existence of: one they desire/protective, one they hate/rival, and one PC who is their Best Friend/Buddy. Since the game is meant to be player-driven, I would think this "network" of NPC's is a good thing no?
October 9th, 2017
The Movie
No, watching this movie won't cause your testicles to fall off.

Yes, I'm a fan of Tabitha St. Germain and Tara Strong.

And yes, this movie competes with Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 2 for "most pop-culture references than you can shake a stick at."

Having said this, and as much as unwarranted persecution sucks, the cases of kid-stalking and otherwise "stranger danger" in MLP cons are enough for me to be wary of a garden variety Comic Book Guy at the showing room.