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Autophobia

Autophobia

by G.H.S.T
Louis Beau is a perfectionist and anxiety-ridden eleventh-grader attending Roseborough High. He lives with his strict and somewhat neglectful father, and constantly tries to best himself to make his father proud. His life, however, runs off course when he befriends Daniel, his ostracized classmate, and the two soon find themselves in a secret love affair. Louis struggles with his sexuality, and his growing fondness of Daniel, all the while trying to gain the approval of his father, his peers, and ultimately, his self.

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**Warning: This story contains/will contain dark and potentially triggering themes like discussion of bullying and mental illness, including anxiety, substance abuse, and self-harm.**
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Pages
672
Updates
1.5 Updates/Week
Last Update
4 Days Ago
Fans
4,772
Readers
3,437

Autophobia

Louis Beau is a perfectionist and anxiety-ridden eleventh-grader attending Roseborough High. He lives with his strict and somewhat neglectful father, and constantly tries to best himself to make his father proud. His life, however, runs off course when he befriends Daniel, his ostracized classmate, and the two soon find themselves in a secret love affair. Louis struggles with his sexuality, and his growing fondness of Daniel, all the while trying to gain the approval of his father, his peers, and ultimately, his self.

---

**Warning: This story contains/will contain dark and potentially triggering themes like discussion of bullying and mental illness, including anxiety, substance abuse, and self-harm.**

Authors

Recent Comments

G.H.S.T
December 9th, 2018
Hey all! I wanted to be able to do a larger update, but unfortunately I haven't been able to do that yet. I still wanted to update this weekend though and I'll try to update again soon-- it is just crazy times with work right now! Thanks for being patient :)
ZSoj
November 25th, 2018
But is/was it mutual? 🤔
Truefan108
November 25th, 2018
He's such a dick and a homophobe!
WingFreak
November 25th, 2018
So many great expressions here.
G.H.S.T
November 24th, 2018
Daniel: What the actual h*ck

P.S. If you follow the comic's tumblr...tumblr is a mess right now. If you want to keep up with updates, please follow my Twitter. I'm so sorry for any inconvenience...I think with Tumblr acting up I will make a complete separate twitter for the comic since that's technically my ~*personal*~ haha

Thank you all for reading! I hope it's not been too much of a hassle to keep up with updates, but will continue to do what I can to keep it easy.
First panel literally my reaction to everything they do.
Louis you tease! Like I totally get why he doesn't want to admit something like that but I still wanna know!!!!!
dishuel
November 18th, 2018
i feel sick over how sweet this page is.
The last panel, the way Louis looks at Daniel, that just melts my heart <3
As someone with severe insomnia, Louis has been me on many, MANY school days. It's so accurate it hurts haha.
Truefan108
November 18th, 2018
These sweet gay children are gonna kill me one day
Bi
I guess I always was attracted to both guys and girls. I remember lusting after both even back in middle school but I kept it a secret until after I graduated high school. Then I started telling my friends “Hey, girls are nice too!”

My grandmother asked me a few years ago (I’ve been out as Bi for years by this time):
“Do you like boys or girls?”
“Do you wanna know?”
(Gives me a look) “You like both, don’t you?”
“Yes”
“Alright, where do you wanna go for lunch?”
I love my grandmother ❤️
MY HEART!
This page is melting my heart
For me, I always sorta knew I was interested in both girls and guys. I’ve always been super affectionate with everyone, holding hands and cuddling with anyone who was down, but I think I realized that I truly like girls too when I was in probably the seventh grade when I was searching up the definition of bisexual because someone in my class had mentioned it. And I was like “oh shit it me” and I just kinda knew. There was a word out there that gave my feelings a label and that it was completely normal. Nowadays I say I’m pansexual because it’s a lot closer to what I really am, but it wasn’t a shock when the light bulb flicked on. I just accepted it because I knew that’s what I was.

And then there were all the girls I was very good friends with, girls I wanted to hug and kiss and be affectionate with especially. It was the same way I felt about guys, and I just thought it was normal. And it was awesome learning that what I was feeling is normal for me, even if there are people who disagree.
G.H.S.T
November 16th, 2018
no, tell him about it. so WE can know.
dishuel
November 15th, 2018
i knew pretty young, like talking maybe around 10 11ish, but it was seen as more of an ohhh noo whats wrong with me(grew up with a super homophobic shitty dad)

i would say i didn't really accept it till like about fourteen and in high school where i crushed hard on girls and it was like gotta just roll with it because there was no hiding that gay.
Like I always knew in a way, but I had this "ohhhhhhh darnit" moment in the locker room in ninth grade (such a cliche, I know) there was this girl in my class and she was undressing facing away from me and I was how beautiful her back was, she had almost black dark skin and the light shone on all the muscles and uh, yeah. I drooled. Then it was like oh yeah, that explains Lola Bunny from Space Jam... And also my first kiss being a girl in preschool.

My sexually falls somewhere on the spectrum of Pan, but I jokingly tell everyone my sexuality is "yes", or "I dunno, but I'm going to get your girlfriend's number tonight" for some guys XD I'm glad I came into myself when I did and was comfortable with the idea of being gay, it saved me a our of the issues that Louis is currently facing.
WingFreak
November 14th, 2018
Hmm...well, I'm pretty sure I had a crush on Double D from Ed Edd 'n' Eddy when I was little. Does that count?

Then again, I'm also trans, so I never really saw liking guys as abnormal or weird back then. Then Lady Wikipedia gave me a little lesson in gender and sexuality and here I am, reading gay comics and being fabulous. 'Course, there were plenty of hints about my gender thing now that I look back on my childhood, but...oh well.
You always do such a great job of representing the thought process of those who don't know their sexuality for sure. I really appreciate Louis' struggle with his identity, and how beautifully the conflict is thought out. Thank you for that.