Genie Wishes

[Mr Aids]

You're able to spawn sandwiches, but they're all 3 days old.

I wish for a monkey paw.

[Wander Tones]

Granted, but it's a real one and not one of those magical ones. Plus it smells like rotten monkey brains.

I wish to be able to divide and reattach my body parts without any harm to the detached parts (for example, if I split myself in half there's no blood and the 'cut' is covered in skin until reattached).

[corruption]

Parts get misplaced. Your hands go missing for a bit, and are used to leave fingerprints at a few crime scenes. Don't even ask about what happens to a few parts perverts get!

I wish for my dreams to become real. (Trick wish, since I like the idea of unleashing my nightmares on the world, and my other dreams are wonderfully sickening as well!)

[Wander Tones]

Granted, but the only dream you have from now on is you endlessly falling. Trust me, after the first couple of hours, it gets boring.

I wish that I had an extra set of arms.

[SushiGummy]

Granted, but they're fat person arms. You can hardly hold yourself up.

I wish I had shapeshifting abilities.

[Wander Tones]

Granted, but you can only shapeshift into yourself.

I wish that I was a fully-controllable rubber version of myself that can defy gravity when stretched (all the cool rubber people do it).

[Mr Aids]

Granted, but you spend the rest of your life being used as a catapult.

I wish I wish I was a fish.

[Wander Tones]

Your wish of the wish came true, making you a fish.
You have a splish and a splash, then a mayonnaise dash.

I wish that Minecraft physics applied to real life.

[MacSimon]

It does, but every night, everywhere, SILENT TERRORISTS ATTACK US.

I wish i could make an excellent album.

[Troll]

You now have an album... with the word "excellent" on the cover.

I wish for world peace.

[Afrohawkman]

Okay, cool. All the nations of the world unanimously agree to be peaceful and decide to get rid of their nukes. Unfortunately, whilst attempting to get rid of a nuke, one of them went off, causing all of Japan to be completely obliterated. I hope you didn't like anime!

I wish I knew of the perfect wish to use. Not the one with no downsides or no possible downsides, just one with more benefits than costs.

[SushiGummy]

You now know the perfect wish, but unfortunately you only know it subconsciously. You won't be able to find out what it is unless you get your brain probed, which kinda results in you being dead.

I wish I was different.

[Asj]

Done. Now you wish you were the same. (you're different in what you want, and nothing else)
hmm... I wish I could do everything as well as I want to (draw/write/etc).

[Mata Nui]

Wish granted, but but after a fatal accident, you want the worst in your life and in all you do.

I wish for an American penny.

[Asj]

(gives you one that's been smashed by a train, and green from wear)

I wish my accident never happened...