User Data
Meleeman
I like drawing, video games, anime, i'm a Furry, I work a dead end job washing dishes and i'm a college student studying 3-d animation?
  • Age
    23
  • Gender
    Male
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yah got a lovely painting style. i'm lazy and I used filters and gradients.
when you were did it..

did you mean "when you did it?"
she's so cute omg... but she should like talk to maiko without getting angry
NUUUU MAKE MORE! :'(
YUS
yeah like the last panel.
i'd say it's an improvement
the next thing I would suggest is including more body language. i find that more difficult to execute but if you can pull it off it really brings your characters to life ya know?
love your background btw.
I feel your pain man. making desks in a background is literally the bane of my existence as a slice of life comic artist. your desks look sexier than mine though. good job man.

when I was reading this I was expecting lynn to say something like "well when you're closer together it's easier to step on eachother" or reference the Porcupine dillema like in Neon Genesis Evangelion
<3
Gotta love the first fights man.
I'll click on your Project wonderful ad to help you out.
@mitchellbravo: I must say your pages are beautifully colored. do you still work traditionally?
doin better than me as far as the buffer goes. lol
i like dem backgrounds bruh.
those backgrounds were a nice change to be honest. but i think in this specific situation, we should be more focused on the characters and their emotions. In dramas I like having backgrounds for establishing setting in a page. after that i'm okay with just the characters and their dialogue, if thats what's important in the scene. i can tell that chris is angry. but i have trouble pinning down Maiko chan's emotions. i can't tell whether she is genuinely concerned, faking it, afraid of losing her. no shock from her lover leaving just like that. no feelings of helpless as someone would feel if they left like that. Maybe Maiko doesn't understand the gravity of the situation, but i still think it warrants more expression from her as a character. now chris you use body language which is good, her expressions are more varied and differen't, Maiko responds in kind being mildly confused, to just uneasy as I see it. we should see more of how uneasy she is in the previous pages, a sweat drop, a heart pound, a tremble, a slight shrinking of the iris, otherwise i'm kinda wondering if Maiko cares at all. some of the expressions in this page also confuse me. chris's reaction to Maiko in page 2. does this show her amazement to Maiko's lack of awareness or about how much she seems to care about her? the third panel i get the idea, but it would be nice if the hand looked more like it was reaching out to her. and it would be enhanced if we could visibly see Chris swivel her body away from Maiko (such as lines indicating movement for example), thus further communicating her distaste of her or her actions.

the 2nd to last panel i think is an "OH SHIT what the fuck have I done" face, but it looks too mild for the situation. the ending panel is nice. but i also think you could employ more varied camera angles to emphasize the events. for example, the middle panel could be slight above shot like you have it, but instead of having the focus in the empty space, bring the camera around so that the 7/8 view of Maiko is closer to us the reader, and focus is on Chris leaving maiko. this would also help emphasize chris's solidarity in her actions, and the helplessness and futility of Maiko's "Chris wait." with the focus being on the back of chris's head, with her body moving swiftly away from us...

that was pretty specific. I do hope you take my unwarrented criticism well. i do like your comic and I wish it the best.
prove her wrong maiko.
ooooohhh damn!
Damn.
Real shit man. i get attached to lies and the liars so much. even though I know they are lying.
Meleeman
September 3rd, 2017
and now we see the whistlehops true intentions.
illegal.
on the reasons why something is bad, saying it's illegal is pretty much like saying "because everyone thinks/says so." i find this line reasoning not morally justifiable. it would be better to say that taking advantage of a child who cannot reproduce or give proper consent, this could lead to benni saying "but I did consent, there was no coercion involved in some cases." which then you could bring up the risks of having unprotected sex even as a minor, which he doesn't understand, therefore it is evident he had been taken advantage of, and had not fully understood the consequences of his actions.
I actually agree with benny somewhat on kits on kits but it's a recipe for disaster once they hit their teenage years, and they only way they are capable knowing is books or other adults or adult media. it's not inherently wrong its just a bad idea.
I remember dis discussion. the classic bad touch.
Meleeman
September 2nd, 2017
i literally don't know what to think right now. not sure if I should be disgusted, amazed, or just fascinated... I think bewildered is the proper term. Campion what goes on in that strange head of yours I love it.