User Data
xLightsOutx
barista/room service waitress/freelance illustrator
xLightsOutx
January 16th, 2017
@Stankard Toohy: eh, speaking as someone who has survived both physical and emotional abuse, i don't think it's really okay to downplay emotional abuse haha ;;;; it's definitely equally as bad, just in a different way.
xLightsOutx
May 26th, 2016
@TomoDatDorkHiro: i did not yell at anyone on the internet about how hard my life is?? :^) i'm simply sharing my personal experiences. and it is not someone else's place to tell me that i am confused about my orientation. i know what i am or am not interested in a hell of a lot better than someone else (especially a doctor who only talks to me maybe five times a year at most). it isn't "sharing logical thinking"-- it's pushing their own orientation onto me. it would be considered kind of strange and invasive if a gay guy were to tell a straight guy, "oh you'll sleep with a guy someday! you just haven't met the right guy yet!" so i don't really think it's acceptable for a straight person to tell me that i'll sleep with someone eventually. it's honestly such a weird and uncomfortable thing to tell someone.
also, if i do decide one day that i was just unsure/confused, then that's my business. it's not anyone else's place to tell me that.
xLightsOutx
May 26th, 2016
@TomoDatDorkHiro: yes, we are lucky to have vaccinations that can help prevent hpv! the issue i had with my doctor was that she was incredibly dismissive of my sexual orientation, implying that my orientation wasn't real at all and that i was just confused. (i have identified as asexual for ten years now, so i am pretty confident that i am not confused, thanks!) i was entering college at the time and she outright told me that i was likely to get drunk one night and end up sleeping around because "that just happens in college." it was really gross of her to act like i have no control over my own actions and my own body. i agree that hpv vaccinations are a good idea! i am not opposed to them at all. but i do think that i should receive the vaccination on my own terms, and i certainly should not be pressured into getting one through insults from my doctor. i don't think that i conveyed any of this clearly through my comic, for which i apologize. i was making this comic for a school project and therefore was severely limited on time, so i had to be concise. unfortunately that resulted in some areas of the comic being unclear. if i were to remake it, i would definitely try to better clarify this section of the comic :^)
xLightsOutx
July 2nd, 2015
@buttertoest: omg ;__; your comment broke my heart. i soo relate, and it's seriously the worst. i hate that not having an interest in sex honestly just flat-out means that some people will refuse to be friends with me. it's like this strange ultimatum -- you either have to be willing to be in a sexual relationship with someone or you can't be around that person at all.
but when i lose a friend like that, i have to remind myself that they really aren't worth my time. if they couldn't comply with the type of relationship that i wanted, then we weren't compatible friends to begin with. they wanted something i couldn't provide for them, and vice versa. for a long time i felt really bad about it, i felt broken too, but it's not that we're broken -- we just simply aren't compatible friends with those people. and that's okay! why waste our energy being upset over those people when we could instead be out there finding people who are okay with us just as we are :^)
xLightsOutx
July 1st, 2015
@Guest: thank you, but none of the pages are intended to look super clean! i intentionally used sort of scratchy/imperfect lines to imitate the feeling of anxiety that these situations cause me. buuut the earlier pages have been fixed up to look like the same style used in the later pages (because although both styles were loose/scratchy, i felt that the later pages conveyed anxiety more effectively). although i've left the unedited pages up online, the edited pages are available in the print version of this comic! :^)

i think it's really important to understand though that not all comics need to have clean and precise lines! i believe that lines should reflect the mood of the comic, and in a comic like this that's about feeling flawed, precise lines really wouldn't make sense imo?

i hope my explanation makes sense!
@nunya and @IlluminatedFantasy: thanks guys!! i will definitely be making more comics in the future! :^D
asexual is now available in print!! if you're interested in buying it, please go to my storenvy! http://autumnalequinox.storenvy.com/

preorders will be available until july 5th. after that, the comic won't be for sale for a while as i get it printed. so be sure to buy a copy before july 5th!

i've never sold a comic before, so this is very exciting for me! :^D
xLightsOutx
June 19th, 2015
i'm soo incredibly late at responding to y'all but i just wanted to say thank you so so so much for the kind comments on this page! i appreciate it so very much. it makes me really happy to hear that you've enjoyed this comic (and that some of you have been able to relate to it)!!

as for those of you who said you'd be interested in buying a copy, that makes me so happy omg!!! i got a test copy printed a while back but there were some margin issues, so i've attempted to correct those issues and am now waiting for the revised printed copy to arrive. i should be getting it any day now, so if everything looks good, i'll go ahead and start selling it online! i'm very excited!!

again, thanks for your support!
xLightsOutx
April 12th, 2015
the end!
(two page update today, so please be sure to read the previous page as well!)

welp, here we are!! the last page! as much as i’d like to end this comic on a 100% positive i-accept-myself note, that wouldn’t be true to my experiences. self-acceptance has been a long and arduous journey and i honestly still struggle with it. but i believe that when you reach that point where you’re ready to try, ready to acknowledge that you at least deserve respect from yourself, even when others aren’t willing to give it to you, that’s a monumental moment. so that’s the point where i’ll be leaving this comic at!

thank you so much for all of your comments and support throughout this story! i hope to maybe attempt selling this comic? would that be something y’all would be interested in? regardless, thanks again, your comments always brightened my day!! i hope to be starting a new comic soon! ‘v’
xLightsOutx
April 11th, 2015
second update today, so please be sure to read the previous page if you haven't already!
xLightsOutx
April 11th, 2015
@polarcomics @witchknox @koruin & @ace here who there?: thanks so much for the comments!!!
xLightsOutx
April 11th, 2015
sometimes that's all it takes :^)
xLightsOutx
April 5th, 2015
@melt: thank you so much!!

@Tijopi11: i soo hear you. it's incredibly frustrating being bombarded by these concepts incessantly. like, i think romantic stories and stories that involve sex are fine, but dang it would be nice to also have stories that don't revolve around those things. i feel incredibly left out too. like i can't understand or relate to those things at all and it makes me feel super ostracized. the amount of stories that DON'T emphasize romantic love and/or sex are so minimal that i could probably count them on one hand lmao 8/
p.s. you should look into aromanticism! along with being asexual, it sounds like you are also describing being aromantic :^)

@Mohimi: the things that you said are very true! but it is undeniable that our society puts a MASSIVE amount of emphasis on romantic love. like holy shit. so much emphasis on it. i think it's honestly hard to comprehend how much emphasis is put on it unless you are aromantic and are overwhelmed by the pressure to engage in romantic love 24/7. like listen to the radio for a while and name ONE song that does not focus on love or sex. it is that strong of an emphasis in our culture. it is impossible for someone who is asexual and/or aromantic to NOT feel weird in a society like this. the amount of hatred, disgust, or denial that an asexual and/or aromantic person faces due to simply being who they are is like. dang. really bad. platonic love is soooo important, especially for someone who is aromantic, but that doesn't mean that our society understands or accepts someone who only engages in platonic relationships. it's honestly naive to deny that. truly, with all of my heart, i do not believe that an aromantic person is weird for not getting married etc etc. but the amount of times that i have been told that i am weird/confused/a freak/etc for being aromantic is mind-boggling. it's easy to say that what other people say doesn't matter, but i gotta tell ya, when you've been told that you're a freak of nature your entire life, it fucking hurts. you can only face that kind of hatred for so long before it wears on you. that's the point of this comic though, u know? trying to educate and familiarize people with these concepts so that hopefully one day we live in a society where ace/aro people do not face these kinds of insults for simply existing.
(THIS IS SUCH A LONG RESPONSE?? DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE??? LMAO IM SO SRRY)

@annanndstann: protective sisters are literally the greatest ever. don't know what i would do without mine whahaha.
xLightsOutx
April 2nd, 2015
@IlluminatedFantasy & @HermesChildOfRain: thanks so much!!
xLightsOutx
March 28th, 2015
updated with two pages today, so please be sure to read the previous page as well!

i'm excited that my sister fiiinally gets to enter the comic hahaha. she's literally the greatest person i've ever met.
oh my goshhh this was so cute
xLightsOutx
March 24th, 2015
@readdreamlove: yep, these are all real experiences. although i have only been very open about being asexual within the past year, i started telling my close friends/family that i am asexual when i was 16, which was nearly ten years ago. so it's not like these are conversations that have all happened within the past week or month; it's been things that i have encountered over a span of many years. but they are stressful and frustrating conversations nonetheless!
thanks very much for your comment!!!
xLightsOutx
March 24th, 2015
updated twice today so please be sure to read the previous page too!
xLightsOutx
March 24th, 2015
@Tessu-chan: thank you!
xLightsOutx
March 24th, 2015
@Samalamb: thank you!!
it is so odd LOL like idk, the concept of asexuality just seems really simple and easy to grasp but people sure do get hung up on it a lot