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I'm a really obscure kind of hipster; you probably haven't heard of it.

Besides my goofy "Factoid Fist", I do lots of other things that are a lot more important: check out my comic adapting 16th Century improv comedy to sci-fi about cyborgs at; hear my throwback electro-industrial involving croquet mallets and a home-made banjo at
@Djoing: You mean BEST choice for a teacher.
If she was smart, she'd have just peed during the explosion and claimed she got hit in the pants by a falling water-cooler.
September 26th, 2012
Sorry if this is a little obscure, but I think the worlds of "Robocop" and "Idiocracy" are only seperated by about fifty years. See, you start with "Robocop", then maybe "Snow Crash", then "Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom" and Woody Allen's "Sleeper", then "Idiocracy", and finally "Romantically Apocalyptic". If you want a happy ending, maybe some kindhearted aliens come help us and you get "Futurama".
This really happened to me at work--random facial expressions, handlebar mustache, and all. If he'd been younger, I'd have thought he was trolling me; if he'd been older, I'd have thought he was senile.
Shoot! I should've drawn one of Paula Dean's kids. This isn't what they look like, is it? Because that would be super.
September 17th, 2012
I'm not actually a fan of the drugs, and in person stoned people can be pretty annoying. Their conversations make good stories, though. Also I'm not sure if this violates some weird SmackJeeves rule about depicting drug use, but you know what? I'm in a devil-may-care sort of mood, so I'm just going to risk it. Maybe it'll help my case if I remind everyone that winners don't do drugs, because if the NES game "NARC" has taught us anything, it's that drug kingpins are evil cyborg tanks, and they will eff you up.
August 14th, 2012
Words that didn't make the cut: Syrupy, Moist, Malted, Florid, Unctuous, Toothsome, Yeasty, Herbaceous, Acetic, McUmbles, McLoins, McLegs. The McClusters were almost McPustules, but that seemed a bit much--especially when they're obviously some sort of egg-clutches.
I'm fairly pleased with this portrait of Obama, even if he does look a little like a Cosby Kid.
I saw some rednecks around town, and I just have to wonder, what is it they think they look like? Because they look like fat guys with mustaches and trucker hats to me. That's not one that I consider a desirable look.
Disclaimer: Factoid Fist is not responsible for book-cases falling over.
Fans of Mariani's original included Queen Victoria, Thomas Edison, Ulysses S. Grant, and Pope Leo, who gave it an official endorsement.
I know I started this comic intending to illustrate trivia, but I lied. I'm really just going to complain about things that happened at work years ago.
That picture on the box really is exactly what it looked like.
Before you ask, her solution is to just get things from the wild herself. Right behind me there is a salt-water tank containing nine sea urchins, a couple of tube worms, some barnacles, dozens of tiny little snails and crabs, and some thing that's kind of like a sand-flea but isn't exactly and we have no idea what it is.
Also, if you ran into a monster, you and your friend had to turn, look each other in the eye, and then scream in each other's faces before you could run away.
First comment! Just thought I'd save all of ya'll the trouble.
Gee, I had always wondered what it would look like if Sonic got crossed with Dr. Manhattan and the King of All Cosmos.
Sorry, boss, can't come in today--adventure comas. What? No, I'm sure. Here comes another one, oh no--I'VE RAINBOW HOVER-BOOTS AND I'M OFF TO THE ICEBERG CITY TO RESCUE THE POPSICLE PRINCESS, WHEEEEEE...whoa. Yeah. See? Totally can't come in today...
@Vitotamito: Awwz, thanks, but if we're using any definition of metal besides 'awesome', I just don't think I am. I like mambos and experimental synth-music more than guitar rock, not one of my t-shirts has the sleeves cut off, and I'm more likely to use the "live long and prosper" salute than whatever you call that metal hand gesture with the horns. Metal horns? I think I heard "rock fist" one time?" You know the one I mean. I don't do that.