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Abocreature
  • Age
    22
  • Gender
    Male
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This is why I love your stuff. All the things that I think are there just for comedy relief are actually well thought out plot points.

That, or maybe I'm just too stupid to see that coming. Oh well.
Wait... Ganondorf's daughter... then that means.....

Oh my god, someone actually slept with Ganondorf! This image will haunt my dreams foreveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!
Is that an African-Irish Link? Sweet.
Dude, you just started a comic and now you're thinking of making two more? You must have a lot of free time on your hands.
Oh, good. I was starting to think this would be one of those "slice-of-life" webcomics.
Generally when I find a gamer girl, as rare as that is, I usually freeze in place an say something along the lines of "Oh my god, I think I love you." and then proceed to awkwardly hug her, followed by a silence in which one or both of us walk away.
Pfft, why don't many people comment on this? This series is great!
Well, died, yes, but I wouldn't say it BLEW UP.

And the Mandalorian's face in the second to last panel reminds me of the "OOOOH!" from Speed Racer.
Wow, this has to be one of the best colored comics I've seen. You do amazing work, and I can't wait for the next page!
Yes, yes they should.

Remember - half of the damn English language is commas, commas, COMMAS!
This page was pretty good as far as grammar goes.
Just as a note - check your helping verbs (you seem to have some trouble with "the" sometimes). They are annoying SoB's, but you gotta use them.
I hope I don't sound nit picky, but in the Author's Commentsm "having romance" should be "going out" or something to that effect.
Ok, lots of English errors on this one.
"Look for him at Miss (Ms. would be fine, for future reference.) MacMale's. I've seen them together lately"
"Seriously? Ok, I will check, thanks!(slightly awkward sentence. Try "I will check there, thanks!" or something to that effect)"
"I have to hurry! See you tomorrow! Bye!"
"MacMale... MacMale... Hmm... I guess she's the one from the drawing classes or... something like that..."
"Aha, bingo!"
"Alright ladies."
The last frame you need to completely rewrite. I don't understand what she is telling them to do.
Same question as HyperKat...
Slight mathematical error on that one, eh?
Tensing error
Saying "forget" in the situation of "I forget what happened" is incorrect. "Forget" is present tense, as in "I tend to forget things". "Forgot" would be past tense. Since she is talking about the past, that would be used instead.

Other than that, pretty good. English is a ridiculously complicated language. I'm glad I was born into it.