How to stay motivated?

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How to stay motivated?

Postby OnePaleChick » April 15th, 2011, 9:28 pm

I have a lot of goals and ideas that I would like to accomplish within the next two years. They're doable in that time frame, but the problem is, I lack motivation. I used to not be that way; infact, I was one of those people who would never give up and always accomplished my goals. But, a few things happened:
Spoiler! :
Basically, when I was young, I wanted to be an ice skater. I was very good at it, and even my teacher said I would go far in that field. I was supposed to represent my entire class and maybe even our state. However, right before the competition, my dad pulled me out because he thought the sport was 'stupid and a waste of time and money'.

Okay, that dream was crushed. So I went on to another dream; roller blading. I was also very good at this, not trying to brag, I'm just saying I was good at it (it's not much different from ice skating). I ended up breaking my ankle, so that dream died too.

The last dream I had was being an artist. I was pretty decent at it and even about to enroll in art school. I loved to draw and I spent hours everyday practicing it. But yeah, surprise surprise, I broke my wrist. My hand writing and drawing has never been the same; when I draw or write now, it's very messy and I press too hard. It took me about two years to just get 'okay' at drawing. I don't find it fun anymore and it's been years since I just sat down and drew anything.


After all that BS happened, I'm not gunna lie, I became lazy. I was stuck inside most days and when it came to effort, I would always do the bare minimum. That's how I am with EVERYTHING, I don't try or strive for doing the best I possibly can, because I just can't be assed. I hate how I'm this way, but no matter what I do (tell myself to keep going, talk to others for support, etc.), I still find myself not caring. I feel like I'll never get my ideas or goals accomplished due to this. I wish I was back to being young, because I never EVER gave up....but now... I just don't care.

tl;dr

I'm lazy and need help to not be lazy.
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby MemaiShirosaki » April 16th, 2011, 12:01 am

Are there any clubs or groups of people in your area that share your interests? I find that when I socialize with people who have the same interests and show motivation towards that interest, I too, become motivated. If big groups of people aren't your thing, have you thought of joining a small project or collaboration online? Being a part of something helps motivate me and it can land me some new friends too. Getting seriously involved in something usually motivates a person to do better, likewise, maybe you could try setting up smaller goals? Say, for drawing, set a goal for trying not to press too hard, and when you've accomplished that, move on to learning to drawing better hands, and then you set the next small goal, etc. Eventually all these little accomplishments are going to feel super fine, that you'll be more motivated than ever to do the best! >w< ♥

If your parents are hindering you from accomplishing these goals, try explaining why you'd like to accomplish it and what it would do for you. As tough as parents can be, they do love you and they usually support their children (my dad wanted me to be a civil engineer, I wanted to be in advertising; after some push and pull he figured he couldn't change my mind and started getting interested in the subject himself).

I'm always open for a chit chat via PM if you'd like to talk a little bit more there :3
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby OnePaleChick » April 16th, 2011, 12:37 am

Haha my mother doesn't care what I do. She isn't the problem at all. I'm 22 years old and I just feel like I'm letting my life fly by without really doing anything. I mean, I enrolled in school this year, so that's something. But I'm mainly doing it because I'm afraid if I don't, I'll be stuck with minimum wage jobs for the rest of my life. I think back at how when I was 18, I had so many goals I had hoped to have done by 20, and I haven't done any of them. I know if I keep this up, I'll be 30 and asking myself why I still haven't done them. I can't really join clubs though, as much as I would love to :( I'm pretty much busy all day >__< But thank you for the advice! I really do want to try collaborating with someone, that is one of my goals, but I'm not sure how to do it when I can't draw for anything and I don't have any fully developed story lines :(
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby MemaiShirosaki » April 16th, 2011, 12:46 am

Hmm, maybe you could try smaller collaborations? Like coloring lineart or doing an art trade? I definitely understand where you're coming from, I had a lack of motivation before entering college, but my school had a lot of side-projects for students to do and that got me motivated to do better when I saw who I was up against. Is there anything like that your school could offer? Like maybe encouraging students to enter competitions or try out for a contest?

Competition motivates me, though I'm not sure if it would work for you > 3<;; Have you tried anything else? I'm sorry I'm giving such lame advice ; 3;
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby mossi-mo » April 17th, 2011, 12:04 am

Are you stopping yourself before you stop because you feel that hte moment you get to a point where you can pass into greatness, the rug will be taken out from under you?

Or perhaps you just haven't found the thing that you can't stop doing, no matter what.

I agree with MemaiShirosaki, getting someone else to support and participate with you will probably do wonders for whatever you choose. Having support makes all the difference.
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby VonRichter » April 18th, 2011, 4:28 am

motivators? hmm...

1. love

2. failing love, enthusiastic like-minded friends

3. donuts

hey, at least #3 is easy!

enemies of motivation:

1. isolation

2. lack of energy from poor health, depression, or both

3. horrifying regrets that eat a person alive every moment of every day
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby Wander Tones » April 18th, 2011, 4:35 am

I've heard that setting out smaller goals and giving yourself rewards upon reaching each goal also helps to motivate one towards the larger goal.

I haven't tried it out yet myself, due to a lack of money, but when I get a job I'm definitely going to try it out by starting contortion training.


Also, as Memai said, finding people who share your interests and actually doing it with them helps a lot. Again, I would like to try this out with contortion, but chances are that no-one where I live wants to do it. It would be nice to have someone to assist with my stretches, and me theirs.
Q wrote:A couple of hours ago, I realised that my body was no longer functioning properly. I felt weak - I could no longer stand. The life was oozing out of me; I lost consciousness.
Picard wrote:You fell asleep.

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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby OnePaleChick » April 21st, 2011, 11:08 am

AHH sorry for not replying sooner, I've been busy trying to catch up on homework and ect. But thanks for the advice guys!

MemaiShirosaki wrote:Hmm, maybe you could try smaller collaborations? Like coloring lineart or doing an art trade? I definitely understand where you're coming from, I had a lack of motivation before entering college, but my school had a lot of side-projects for students to do and that got me motivated to do better when I saw who I was up against. Is there anything like that your school could offer? Like maybe encouraging students to enter competitions or try out for a contest?

Competition motivates me, though I'm not sure if it would work for you > 3<;; Have you tried anything else? I'm sorry I'm giving such lame advice ; 3;

That's a good idea; I can still color pretty well, perhaps just coloring some line art would help motivate me into sticking with more serious goals. And your advice isn't lame, thank you!
mossi-mo wrote:Are you stopping yourself before you stop because you feel that hte moment you get to a point where you can pass into greatness, the rug will be taken out from under you?

Or perhaps you just haven't found the thing that you can't stop doing, no matter what.

I agree with MemaiShirosaki, getting someone else to support and participate with you will probably do wonders for whatever you choose. Having support makes all the difference.

Those are good points; a lot of times if I'm not good at something I don't want to continue, and then when I do get good at something, I don't take it any further. Perhaps I am scared of failure :/ I have yet to find something I can't stop doing no matter what. It used to be drawing and ice skating, but now I can't even get into either (2nd one is impossible since there's no ice skating rink around). I wish I had friends who weren't underachievers

VonRichter wrote:motivators? hmm...

1. love

2. failing love, enthusiastic like-minded friends

3. donuts

hey, at least #3 is easy!

enemies of motivation:

1. isolation

2. lack of energy from poor health, depression, or both

3. horrifying regrets that eat a person alive every moment of every day


Falling in love won't happen as I've been through 'that' in my younger days and now I see it as bs that I don't care to associate myself with. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends and family, but I don't care for 'falling in love'. However, I seem to have poor health (trying to fix it!) and sometimes I do stay in the past >_<


Wander Tones wrote:I've heard that setting out smaller goals and giving yourself rewards upon reaching each goal also helps to motivate one towards the larger goal.

I haven't tried it out yet myself, due to a lack of money, but when I get a job I'm definitely going to try it out by starting contortion training.


Also, as Memai said, finding people who share your interests and actually doing it with them helps a lot. Again, I would like to try this out with contortion, but chances are that no-one where I live wants to do it. It would be nice to have someone to assist with my stretches, and me theirs.


I wish I could contortion too, bet it would feel nice in the morning LOL
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby Rivana » April 21st, 2011, 12:09 pm

I understand your situation too and I was in a similar state at some point in my life though I never really did anything great like ice skating and such. I am just overall unmotivated in the past lol

and the falling in love part and thinking how much of a bs it is? Ah yeah, been there too! Then I met my now husband and all is well. Take your time. It'd come when you least expect it as with most good things in life :) You're young, there's a whole road ahead of you.

Anyhow, like I said I was mostly unmotivated in everything I do lol.

This may be a really bad piece of advice but I really never knew what I wanted to do until..I think last year when I re-discovered drawing. But , I wouldn't call myself unsuccessful in the years before that. I pretty much just went with the flow, doing what is expected of me, doing it well enough to get by/excel. I couldn't decide on a career when I was supposed to pick a school for college...I just picked what I thought was in demand/high paying career, got my diploma and been working on the same field and have a successful career for 11 years so far.

All that while unmotivated and undecided on what I really want to do. HOw the hell did I manage, you ask? I dunno, I just found little hobbies that I like on the side that made day to day stuff easier. From comicbooks, to video games, to singing, etc. At this point I realize that life is a journey to self-discovery in itself. Some may find their calling earlier than the others but in the meantime, enjoy the ride, expand your horizons and at some point you'd find what you really want to do. No need to contain yourself in a box for fear of failure.


Anyhow, back to drawing. I liked drawing since I was a kid but just never took it seriously. Just doodled and sketched my favorite characters and whatnot. Last year I just decided to put this story into a comic, decided I want to learn how to draw and realized that I love art. So now I am motivated..after 30 years O_O

In relation to you breaking your wrist and being able to learn by persevering, I think you really got what it takes and shouldn't be afraid to try again. I can kinda relate to that although in a different way...

See...I was born left-handed and due to some silly superstition my mom believed in, she forced me to become right handed. Now I write and draw with my right hand. I still can't help but wonder if had I've been a lefty all along I would be drawing better..but I just wouldn't let that what-if stop me from doing what I like to do. Of course I could still try to learn drawing with my left hand at some point..but yeah, that's a story for another day lol.

gah sorry for the long unnecessary babble. I tend to do that :(
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby Nikkinoodles » April 21st, 2011, 12:39 pm

I think part of you lack of motivation could be stemming from the 'destruction' of your past dreams and goals. Just as you've began to really reach your goals in the past something's happened to completely ruin them in effect. Maybe this has sub-consciously, or even consciously, gotten into your head that you couldn't reach the goals you might set yourself so now you just don't bother. It sounds obvious but sometimes people just don't notice this when it's themselves that it's affecting.

What I can think of is, as everyone else has already said, set yourself small, reachable goals and as you reach them it may let your subconscious realise that your goals won't always be halted. Gradually that might encourage your motivation and get your sub-conscious thinking that, actually, you can make goals and reach them.
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby Wander Tones » April 21st, 2011, 12:57 pm

OnePaleChick wrote:
Wander Tones wrote:I've heard that setting out smaller goals and giving yourself rewards upon reaching each goal also helps to motivate one towards the larger goal.

I haven't tried it out yet myself, due to a lack of money, but when I get a job I'm definitely going to try it out by starting contortion training.


Also, as Memai said, finding people who share your interests and actually doing it with them helps a lot. Again, I would like to try this out with contortion, but chances are that no-one where I live wants to do it. It would be nice to have someone to assist with my stretches, and me theirs.


I wish I could contortion too, bet it would feel nice in the morning LOL

Well, not in the beginning, when every worthwhile stretch is still a while away, but when you can do something like what my avatar's doing without strain, it'd be very relaxing and comfortable.

Even though it would be really good to have someone to physically get in contact with and help (I mean actually meeting up with them), it would be cool to have a contortion buddy over the internet and share tips and goals. There could even be little challenges, where both people try and beat the other to a certain goal (such as doing the splits or doing a cheststand).
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Picard wrote:You fell asleep.

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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby peaceofpie » April 21st, 2011, 2:33 pm

Rivana wrote:See...I was born left-handed and due to some silly superstition my mom believed in, she forced me to become right handed. Now I write and draw with my right hand. I still can't help but wonder if had I've been a lefty all along I would be drawing better..but I just wouldn't let that what-if stop me from doing what I like to do. Of course I could still try to learn drawing with my left hand at some point..but yeah, that's a story for another day lol.

gah sorry for the long unnecessary babble. I tend to do that :(


Can I just say that you are an amazing artist, despite this. I have drawn with my dominant hand my whole life and I would say in terms of technical skill and versatility, your art is much stronger than mine. I didn't even know it was possible for someone to train their non-dominant hand to be so strong.
So don't be discouraged! You have done an amazing thing here.

And to the poster of the original topic, I think Rivana's story is actually very motivating. It shows that there are plenty of setbacks in life, but we can overcome.
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby gevans1961 » April 21st, 2011, 3:18 pm

This is what I do to stay motivated but, I don't know if it'll work for everybody.

1. Drink water
2. Keep a clean and organized workspace.
3. Get a planner and write 5 little goals that lead to one big dream for each day.
4. Excercise 4 times a week.
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby Rivana » April 21st, 2011, 4:58 pm

peaceofpie wrote:

Can I just say that you are an amazing artist, despite this. I have drawn with my dominant hand my whole life and I would say in terms of technical skill and versatility, your art is much stronger than mine. I didn't even know it was possible for someone to train their non-dominant hand to be so strong.
So don't be discouraged! You have done an amazing thing here.



Thanks *hug*. I was very little when I was forced to use my right hand. I never really consciously thought about it since it never really affected me until I got more into drawing. So I just kinda wondered lol.

It's pretty evident though that I am still a lefty because I can use chopsticks waaaaay better with my left hand and when I work out, my left hand is stronger. I also play sports with my left hand more dominant most of the time.

So yeah that's why I tend to think that drawing with my left hand would make a difference if I stuck with it. I tried and I still draw better with my right hand at this point. I do notice that action lines seem to flow smoothly/naturally if I draw it with my left hand on paper. So that's something that I can explore I suppose.

I also like gevans list, simple, short and sweet. It's so easy to get overwhelmed by so many things sometimes and keeping your goals simple and realistic is always a good idea.
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Re: How to stay motivated?

Postby VonRichter » April 25th, 2011, 3:41 am

Rivana wrote:It's pretty evident though that I am still a lefty because I can use chopsticks waaaaay better with my left hand and when I work out, my left hand is stronger. I also play sports with my left hand more dominant most of the time.

So yeah that's why I tend to think that drawing with my left hand would make a difference if I stuck with it. I tried and I still draw better with my right hand at this point. I do notice that action lines seem to flow smoothly/naturally if I draw it with my left hand on paper. So that's something that I can explore I suppose.

Ambidextrous drawing! Avoid rotating pages! ;)
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