Break the bank.

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Re: Break the bank.

Postby Yochanan » December 4th, 2014, 11:34 am

You realize too late that it is The Funniest Joke In The World, dying as you do und laugh.

I ellisonise everyone in the room, and then take a motor that runs on suffering and use the overall suffering of the room to power the motor. I then use the motor to power a device that automatically ellisonises people, and link it to the motor, so I can ellisonise more people to cause more suffering. After that, I redirect the power to a big laser to destroy the vault and take my money. Since everyone fears a fate as bad as death when they get near me, they will not go near me.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby 1ce_k1d » December 4th, 2014, 11:37 pm

Mario (who has extra lives) jumps on the machine.

I jump into a security guard's iPhone when he's not looking.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby hitkid96fan » December 5th, 2014, 7:00 pm

His iPhone sadly is very damaged. And not to mention the guard is a klutz, he drops the iPhone and it breaks with you in it.

I will shoot everyone in the bank with a sleep dart than keep a trigger sleep-bomb near those who are asleep to make sure my getaway is undisturbed.
Don't die on me.

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Re: Break the bank.

Postby 1ce_k1d » December 5th, 2014, 10:11 pm

The bomb was asleep, therefore does not work. Everyone wakes up as soon as you pop out of the vault.

I take the sleeping bomb, wake it, then toss it into the bank.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby Yochanan » December 5th, 2014, 10:50 pm

Sleep bomb: Who has disturbed my slumber! Oh, it is just you. Yeah man, I don't assist in crimes. Sorry m8, you're on your own.

I start lurking 9gag to see who is willing to join my ranks. I convince everyone on 9gag that this particular bank is the center of all OC operations, and lead them to attack. I convince them that I need the money to take on legitimate humour.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby 1ce_k1d » December 7th, 2014, 3:29 am

Turns out the bank IS the center of OC operations. And they have guards like you've never seen before.

I tell the average house man that I'm going to rob the bank, and give him the exact details on paper. He immediately posts it online, and everyone thinks he's crazy, so they put up less resistance when the time finally comes.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby hitkid96fan » December 18th, 2014, 12:06 am

You forgot one tiny little IMPORTANT detail. So you are going to be spending the next week trying to recover from a rocket in a hospital. It's also watched by highly-trained soldiers.

I will convincingly convince everyone in this topic to help me form this one-time job where we use all our strengths to the advantage and using each other's strength to prevent our weaknesses and pull off the heist of the century.
Don't die on me.

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Re: Break the bank.

Postby Knetti90 » December 18th, 2014, 10:17 pm

I'm actually a changeling because the real Knetti90 was kidnapped by fairies as a child so I switch everyone helping you (including yourself) with my changeling minions.

My changeling minions help me get the money for myself so I can return to the land of fairies a rich hero.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby 1ce_k1d » December 31st, 2014, 2:52 am

The land of fairies have recently been taken over by the 1920's communist party, rendering your riches pointless.

I stuff all the security guards into a Rubik's cube, one by one, and twist it up. The only way to get them out is solving the cube to the side that they were put in.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby The_Hankerchief » December 31st, 2014, 9:25 am

Kevansevans comes in and solves the hell out of it, then proceeds to down a 72-oz. steak whole and spike the Rubik's cube into your temple while uttering one of the wittier one-liners from a Bond movie.

It's winter time, and Seasonal Affective Disorder is a thing, where people get sad due to, among other things, a lack of sunlight. I replace the fluorescent light bulbs with happy light bulbs to improve everyone's mood and well-being. This results in me walking out of the bank, money in hand, and everybody is happy about it.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby 1ce_k1d » January 1st, 2015, 12:52 am

The guards, while not happy about it, have to arrest you anyway. It's the law.

I frame the guy below me with a bank robbery, catch him/her myself, then get the banks money as a reward.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby Randumbz » January 4th, 2015, 7:52 pm

But my lawyer is Phoenix Wright and he manages to convince the jury that the only person that could've committed the crime is you. You're arrested and I regain my freedom.

I use my invisibility cloak to sneak into the bank vault later that night.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby Master_72 » January 10th, 2015, 9:25 am

Unfortunately, you end up bumping into someone. Bullets are sprayed everywhere in an attempt t shoot you and you end up with more holes in you than a cheese grate.

I situate myself on a nearby cliff outside the bank, pull out my sniper rifle, and slowly kill off every one of the guards with tranquilizer darts instead of bullets. When all the guards have been neutralized, I run inside with a real gun and shoot all the guards, finally making my way to the bank vault unguarded.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby The_Hankerchief » January 10th, 2015, 9:58 am

While you are raiding the contents of the vault, one of the dead guards' bodies, which was previously slumped against the wall, falls over and bumps the vault door, which swings closed and locks you inside. Sure, you got in, but your victory is only Pyrrhic in nature.

I jump the General Lee over the bank. I'm not sure what this accomplishes, but it is totally awesome.
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Re: Break the bank.

Postby Guest » January 17th, 2015, 6:02 am

in that case you call escape the prison specialist who helps you out to escape and infiltrate on one of the local flights to Alaska. stay low profile for two months and than come back for money.
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